Why I Want Nerdy Kids

Let's face it..Levi and offspring #2 don't stand much a chance genetically. I mean, when my parents had to tell me in high school not to study so much that was a sign right there. Another sign might be when the father excels in math and science and wore four inch thick glasses as a child (sorry Lawrence it's true). Going into having children, I told people we were gunning for chess champions not cheerleaders. 

Sure, there is the teasing but we have it all figured out. Note: I am going to come off stereoptying my own kind here.....deal with it. But, if this is the case, we will enroll our children in an all Jewish school. I mean even if the kid can hit a baseball ten feet he would be considered cool and athletic. I can only say this because I attended a "gifted magnet" (read nerdville) elementary. I thought I was really cool coming out of 5th grade. I can not stress this enough. I mean the giant New Kids On The Block button on my denim jacket, my neon slap bracelets, the high pony tail with multiple scrunchies.....I had it all together. Reality hit fast and hard I was forced to mainstream into a general public middle school in the Bay Area away from my Jewish nerdy posse. I was suddenly the opposite of cool. How was I fooled for so long? 

The key my friends is to isolate your child in this window of nerdiness (aka nerd bubble) until college. (<-----Please sense tiny amount of sarcasm here, tiny). If you can bypass that window of horror between the ages of 12-18, you are in clear waters. College and post college rewards nerds: Mark Zuckerberg was probably not voted COOLEST KID in high school right?

So why would a parent wish this on their child? Well, while the cool kids were attending parties and doing drugs in high school, I was too busy sucking up to my Spanish teacher working on my extra credit pinata and calculating the lap splits I had to run to improve my mile time. On that topic, I will also encourage my sons to run cross country (read nerd magnet #2). I mean, was it really a surprise that our cross country team won high GPA award every freaking year in high school AND college? How can you even get into trouble when you have to go to bed at 9pm because you have to run 10 miles in the morning? Drinks at a party? Forget about it... too dehydrating! 

See, nerds are really a parent's dream and nothing would make me happier than to see my sons become cross country running nerds (Minus the glasses). So, will nerds breed nerds? It is far to early to tell although Levi was wearing his pants a "tad" high today.